Looking Fear in the face...

Jalapeno! It's been a while, I know, and I feel really bad that I haven't been keeping up with this like I wanted to (even though no one is reading it). The holidays were nuts, then school started and I've been up to my eyeballs in mind-numbingly boring Ethics homework (I'll get into how much I hate philosophy at some other time...). Anyway, I'm back now - so on with the show...

I recently realized that I am scared half witless of the possibility of having one of my dreams come true. I'm not afraid of the work, or the long hours, or the minor failures that lead up to those "Ah-HA!!" moments when you finally figure out how to do something. No, what I'm afraid of is letting people down. The thought that someone I care about is willing to go out on a limb to help me attain one of my goals scares the hell out of me, because if I fail I will be letting them down. But if I get this particular opportunity and don't take it and run, I know I will regret it for the rest of my life. So I'll just continue to psych myself up as best I can, and make the immortal words of Anais Nin my mantra:

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."